DON’T turn on post notifications (or maybe do, idk)


People are losing their minds over Instagram’s impending feed change, and I don’t blame them. Change in real life is scary shit — but change in social media worlds? Traumatizing.

The neurotic, obsessive-compulsive pedant in me is horrified by the idea of a non-chronological feed. There’s something incredibly satisfying about knowing exactly what you’ve seen (or haven’t seen) from accounts you care enough about to follow. In a world of fleeting Snaps and unstable Facebook newsfeeds inexplicably delivering a disproportionate number of posts about ugly babies and intense religious convictions, I could always find order and balance on Instagram. Instagram was my feng shui’d social space.

You may have seen a number of users asking you to turn on post notifications by tapping on the three little dots at the upper right corner of their posts. Now, I don’t know the key to success or the secret to happiness or the way to Mordor, but I’m pretty sure more notifications aren’t the answer. New types of alerts are already spawning up on my devices every day, and I have to squash them before their jingles root themselves into my brain and start to breed horrible, new, uglybaby jingles. My phone used to shout “It’s Britney, bitch” anytime someone Facebooked me…which, now that I think of it, was kind of awesome…but NO. Cannot go back to that. Must. Try. To Be. A Person.

So, no. I will not be asking anyone to turn on post notifications for me — though I certainly won’t hold it against you if you do of your own accord 😀 But in the larger sense, Algorithmaggedon will simply have to be my personal challenge to make better shit, and drive visibility and feed delivery through genuine engagement. My honest hope is that I can rise to the test and create relevant posts that are worth liking, commenting on, and sharing.

(LOL also, talk to me in like a month when this doesn’t happen and my account is dead forever. I’m a practical cynicist, after all.)

It is rather sad that Instagram cares more about monetizing than maintaining the integrity of its platform, but…there you have it, yet again. The world doesn’t run on rainbows and puppy love.

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